Some people dread their office job. They hate it with every fiber of their being, but keep doing it anyway. That’s why it’s good to vent a little and make it more fun for yourself. Twitter hero @OhNoSheTwitnt’s way of dealing with it is to tweet about the weird things her coworkers say and do.
1. OhNoSheTwitnt doesn’t have the most open minded colleagues… or does she?
A coworker who won't let her son play with dolls bc it's "gay" bought her daughter a shirt that says "I found my prince & his name is Daddy"
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) July 3, 2017
2. This is… very accurate.
Spoiler alert: Tomorrow, a coworker will comment about how it feels like Monday even though it isn't Monday.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) September 4, 2017
3. Some of her coworkers aren’t very imaginative.
[during fire drill]
Me: I wish a fire drill were an actual drill made of fire. How cool of a weapon would that be?
Coworker: Sorry, what?
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) August 4, 2017
4. We’re all still getting used to it.
280 character tweets feel like every conversation with a coworker I try to avoid but can't.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) November 9, 2017
5. Make sure you remember their names.
[Coworker says good morning and doesn’t spit on me or kick me in the shins]
Me: Jeff for president in 2020!
Jeff: My name is Steve.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) January 8, 2018
6. How do some people not fall down more?
[Actual conversation]
Coworker: Wait you have a gay sister AND a gay sister-in-law.
Me: Yes.
Coworker: Maybe it’s genetic?
Me: …
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) November 30, 2017
7. It got worse.
Me: (shows pic of my niece and nephew) They turned 3 today.
Coworker: How cute! Who are the 2 women.
Me: My sister-in-law and her wife.
Coworker: Which one is the mom and which one is the dad?
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) December 4, 2017
8. That would improve the massage by 1000%.
I still think about the time my coworker pronounced "shiatsu" as "Shih Tzu" and imagine her being massaged by tiny Chinese dogs.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) December 18, 2017
9. Not buying it.
Me: Why is Ron Weasley singing with Beyoncé?
Coworker: That's Ed Sheeran.
Me: Nice try, Voldemort.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) December 1, 2017
10. Um…
A coworker who called me "un-American" because I don't eat pork just told me he doesn't vote.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) November 7, 2017
11. They have some trouble with her Disney references.
Coworker: (whispering hoarsely) I can’t talk. I lost my voice.
Me: Praise Ursula!
Her: What?
Me: I mean I hope you feel better soon.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) January 10, 2018
12. She’s not wrong.
Coworker: [shows me pic of her baby]
Me: [shows her pic of my cat] Here's mine.
Coworker: That's a cat.
Me: Cats are just goth babies.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) October 26, 2017
13. Her coworkers aren’t into Halloween.
My coworker with a bloody pic of Jesus on the cross in her cubicle doesn't like my plastic skeleton decorations bc they're "too scary."
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) October 25, 2017
14. Some coworkers have issues with her use of language.
Me: (reading the news just now) Oh for god's sake.
Coworker: Don't use the lord's name in vain.
Me: Sorry. Oh for fuck's sake.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) October 18, 2017
15. This sounds like it could be the same coworker.
Yesterday morning I got in trouble at work because my Trump supporter coworker tattled on me to the boss for whispering a swear word in my cubicle because my computer froze.
Yesterday afternoon Trump called entire countries shitholes because black people live there.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) January 12, 2018
16. Only in America.
My coworker actually said she's going to start homeschooling her kids now because they have guns at home to protect them.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) October 3, 2017
17. It’s always nice to show off your favorite parts of your workplace.
[Take Your Child To Work Day]
See, honey? This is my cubicle where I die a bit each day, and over there is the coat closet I go in to cry.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) April 27, 2017
18. This is absolute hell.
In apolitical news I just got 179 emails because a coworker accidentally emailed the whole company & everyone replied back to all REMOVE ME.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) March 9, 2017
19. At least her coworkers’ kids know what’s up.
My coworker's 5-year-old just told me that Trump is a jerkface so maybe we don't need an electoral college we need an electoral kindergarten
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) February 15, 2017
20. “But does she at least enjoy her job,” you ask?
[getting pulled over on my way to work]
Cop: Where's the fire, ma'am?
Me: Hopefully at my office, sir.— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) September 8, 2016
So if your office job is getting down, don’t forget that you can always vent about your annoying coworkers.
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